Jerry Springer: [walks in] Hello and welcome to todays show.  Todays' show is called "I have a Secret to Tell".  Our first guest comes from Capsule Corporation.  Here she is  Bulma Briefs.
Bulma: [comes out of backstage and takes a seat onstage]
Audience: [cheers and wolf whistles at Bulma]
Jerry: Welcome to the show Bulma.
Bulma: Thanks for having me.
Jerry:  You have a secret for us today don't you Bulma?
Bulma: Well it's more of a secret to my boyfriend.
Audience:  Oooooo.
Jerry: Well lets bring him out [reads card] here's Yamcha!
Yamcha: [comes out from backstage and eyes the crowd.. walks up to Bulma hugs her and takes a seat]
Audience: OooooOOooo!
Jerry: Um hello Yamcha welcome to the show.  Bulma has something she'd like to tell you.
Yamcha: [turns to face Bulma] You want to marry me don't you? [grins stupidly]
Bulma: [calmly] No Yamcha, that's not why I brought you here.   [A bit nervous] You see you haven't been paying attention to me lately and you've been fooling around behind my back...
Audience: Ooooohhhh!
Yamcha: [sighs to audience] Ohhh shut up.
Bulma: [continues] I-I I've been seeing another man.
Yamcha:  WHAT?!
Jerry: [paces back and forth in the audience]
Bulma: [to Jerry] Well he always cheats on me!  I'm so tired of it.  He flirts with girls right in front of my face!
Audience: awwwww.
Yamcha: [still seething] who is the asshole anyway? Do I know him?
Bulma: [cautiously]  Well remember that dream I had... about Vegeta returning...
Yamcha: [shocked and veins start to appear on his head]  Noooooo
Bulma: [nods]
Jerry: Lets bring out our next guest... Vegeta!
Vegeta:  [walks onstage with a single rose and hands it to Bulma and kisses her on the lips then sits next to her]
Audience: OOOOOOOOOOOO!
Yamcha: [dives after Vegeta] I'll kill you!!!!!!
Vegeta: [uses a small Ki blast to send Yamcha back to his seat] Yeah sure weakling... like that is going to happen.
Audience: [dissapointed that there was no real fight] aww.
Jerry: So, Vegeta, how long have you and Bulma been going out together?
Vegeta: I don't have to answer your stupid questions.  [crosses his arms and scowls]
Bulma: [nervous laughter]  Well we've been together for quite a few months.
Yamcha: How can you go out with him Bulma?  He's evil!
Audience member 1:  [grabs Jerry's microphone]   Yeah.  That dude with the spikey hair seems more like an asshole than that scarfaced guy.
Bulma: [angered] Well at least he's faithful!
Vegeta: [looks at Bulma.  His features soften a moment then return to their normal scowl]
Yamcha:  So what if I have scars?  I can get anyone I want.
Jerry: Bulma, isn't there something you wanted to tell both men?
Bulma: Yes.  I'm pregnant by Vegeta.
Vegeta: [Quitely]   Really?
Bulma: [nods]
Yamcha: [furious]  You stupid slut!
audience: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Bulma:  I'm not a slut.  You're the one who's stupid.. even Goku and Piccolo knew about it.
Jerry: lets bring out Goku.
Goku: [come out on stage and sits next to Yamcha]  Yeah.. I knew about it.  What's your point?
Yamcha: Gah!  Why didn't anyone tell me about it.
Puar: [flies out from behind backstage]  Hi!! [flies to Yamcha] Pooor baby!!!!  [grabs him and covers him with kisses]
Audience: ewwwwwww!
Bulma: [laughs]  Yamcha is that your new girlfriend?
Yamcha:  At least she won't leave me for a loser Saiyan.
Vegeta:  Shut up weak human!  I'm a Saiyan Prince!  I could kill you now.
Yamcha: [shuts up]
Audience member 2:  [giggles]  Bulma, if you could use one word to describe Vegeta.. What would it be?
Bulma:  [blushes and looks at Vegeta]  Stamina.
Audience: Woo-hoo!  Vegeta!  Yeah!
Goku:  What's she talking about?
Puar: [suddenly flies up to Bulma]   You hurt my Yam-akins!  [slaps Bulma]
Audience: [excited at the thought of two women (?) fighting] JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
Bulma: [swats at Puar ]
Puar: [ Pulls Bulma's hair]  You-you-you harlot!
Bulma: That's it bitch!  [ Punches Puar into Yamcha knocking Puar out for a moment]
Audience: [laughs at Puar's lame attempt at a fight]
Goku: [scratches his head]  Why am I here again?
Vegeta: [smirks at Bulma's actions]  Hehe. [then turns to Goku]  Shut up Kakarrot.
Puar: [starts to weep in Yamcha's arms]  I did the best I could, baby.  She's just too strong for me.
Yamcha:  Maybe you just need to train more.
Puar:  [hugs Yamcha]  My sweetheart!
Yamcha:  [gets down on one knee]  Puar, will you marry me?
Puar: [excitedly]  YES, OH YES!
Audience: [disgusted]  Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
Goku: This is getting pretty scary.
Bulma: That's pathetic!
Audience Member 3:  Um, Vegeta... would you sleep with me?
Vegeta:  What are you stupid?  No.
Jerry: So it seems that everything is fine.  Yamcha.. are you okay with this?
Yamcha: [arm around Puar] Sure.
Jerry: Bulma?  What about the baby?
Bulma: I've done several tests on myself.  It will be a boy and I've decided to name him Trunks.
Jerry:  Any plans to marry Vegeta?
Bulma:  [nervously eyes Vegeta]  We're still thinking about it.
Vegeta: [snorts a response] Hmph.
Jerry: [sits in a corner]  People often think that just because they are cheated on that they can cheat on their lover.  But in the case of today's show.. maybe it was the right choice.  And maybe your old lover will choose to marry a flying cat thing.  And maybe you will end up pregnant by a Saiyan, but whatever the outcome remember... take care of yourselves and each other.